When I was pregnant with my daughter, everyone I encountered had a piece of advice for me. People told me that I should sleep when the baby sleeps. People let me know that parenting takes a lot of patience. People warned me about that parenthood could cause stress in the relationship with my significant other. This was all good advice, but there was one thing that I wish I would have known. I wish someone would have explained to me the one thing that I find most trying about parenting...the self-doubt.
This seems to be the least talked about issue in parenting, but time after time I find myself bogged down with self-doubt. I would do anything for my daughter and try my hardest to be the best parent that I can be. Despite all this, I still have days when I just feel like a bad mother. I forget to brush my little one's teeth before bed. I let her watch TV for three hours straight so I can catch a break. I feel like I'm not spending enough quality time with her. I think we all have these moments, but there is nothing that causes more grief for me.
The other day, I was feeling particularly overwhelmed with this feeling. My daughter was being uncharacteristically clingy, and I was starting to worry about the lack of interaction she was getting with other children. I was behind on my homework and my house was a total mess. Needless to say, I was just feeling like a complete failure. I called a friend of mine in a moment of need. She's a mother as well, and after listening to all my worries, she said something that actually made me feel better.
She told me, "None of us are perfect. That doesn't make you a good mother or a bad mother. It makes you a human being."
Now, this is my first child, and I still have no idea what I"m doing, but this is something I'm learning as I grow as a parent. I AM a human being. No matter how hard I try, I will make mistakes. I guess this is okay, and the older my daughter gets the less anxiety I have about my parenting skills. I will probably always have days of self-doubt. However, I also know that my daughter is learning and growing and developing into a lovely person, despite the fact that I forgot to brush her teeth.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Five Things my Neighbors Shouldn't Do if They Don't Want Punched in the Face
Sorry about the super long blog title. But, I had to find something that would fit this post perfectly. Let me start out by saying that we are still staying in our apartment. The new house reno is moving along smoothly, but things still aren't quite done. So, we're still in our old place, and I'm still dealing with our crazy neighbors. And crazy is an UNDERSTATEMENT. These people are absolutely nuts. Sorry if any of my perfectly normal, nice neighbors are reading this. It's just that I've never met any of you because you're probably just as scared as I am to leave your unit and deal with these weirdos as I am.
The straw that broke the camels back and motivated me to write this post was an event that happened just a few hours ago. Wait til you hear this...This man, a neighbor of mine, came knocking on my door. This doesn't seem so weird, except for the fact that it was almost 11 o' clock at night. When I opened the door, he proceeded to try to sell me his television. Yes, his television. I tried to tell him politely that we already had a television and did not want or need his. But, this pyscho just would not give up. He kept trying to tell me all about the attributes of this (apparently) great TV that he had, even though it didn't even work! Sorry dude, I don't want your television and I especially don't want your shitty, broken television. Also, $50 is not a steal for a shitty, broken television.
After that creepy encounter, I decided to compile a list of things that my I wish my neighbors would stop doing and narrowed it down to the five most irritating. I'm not annoyed with loud music or screaming kids upstairs. I understand that you should expect those kinds of things in an apartment. There are some things, however, that I just can't deal with. We'll start with number 5.
5. Hanging out in the parking lot-Yes, I'm looking at you Camero guy. Camero guy, as my husband and I fondly refer to him, is a guy that just sits on his Camero in the parking lot all day and night. We have sometimes wondered if he even has an apartment here. I've never seen him in the building. Camero guy and his friends, who are all probably in their forties, are taking over our parking lot. I can tolerate underage teeny-boppers hanging out by my car. I cannot tolerate 40 year old men with no lives keeping me awake all night.
4. Smoking in the halls-There is absolutely no reason why you should be smoking in the hallway. Part of the reason we moved into this building is because of the non-smoking policy. I don't care if it's cold. If you need to smoke that badly, step outside. Or at least step inside your own unit, open a window, and try to conceal it. My visitors and I do not want to see/smell you smoking the moment we walk into the building.
3. Doing 50 loads of laundry at a time-We only have 3 (occupied) units on the floor we live on. There are 4 washers and 4 dryers in the laundry room on our floor. You would think that would be enough, right? Wrong. Every single time I go to do laundry, the lady at the end of the hall is taking up all 4 washers and all 4 dryers AT THE SAME TIME. I go back an hour later and she's still hoarding all the machines. One day, I went into the laundry room and seen that all the machines were full. The crazy laundry lady was in there and apologized for the inconvience. I told her I would just go down a floor and do laundry there. I thought it was a good compromise, until she told me that she was also taking up all those machines. Really lady? Who does 16 loads of laundry at once? And she still dresses like a hobo.
2. Leaving your crap in the hallway-This is so irritating to me. One of the things that I love the most about my apartment is the Huge double closet in the entry way. It is literally a walk in closet. We have a strollers, bikes, and all kinds of other large objects in ours. Not only that, but we also all have assigned storage units in the basement of the building. I"m not sure what all my neighbors are using their spaces for though, because all their crap is in the hallway! The couple below me has two bikes, a stroller, and a coffee table sitting outside their door. It's unsightly and if you have that much stuff inside your apartment that it's overflowing into the hallway, you need to call Hoarders. Also, if you are looking to get rid of your crap that won't fit in the hallway, I do not want to buy it.
1. The Notes-Nothing annoys me more than when my neighbors leave all kinds of notes around the building. We've never had a problem with this anywhere else we've lived, but you can walk around and see notes everywhere in this building. I don't know how this strange behavior started, but it needs to stop. If I park my car crooked, someone leaves a rude note about how I made it difficult for them to get into the spot next to me. If I leave my clothes in the dryer too long, someone leaves a note about how disrespectful I am and threatens to throw my garments away(Note:There were 3 other dryers open for use). I could go on and on. If you have something to say to me..here's an idea...why don't you say it!?!? Your illegible chicken-scratch of misspelled words is not reallly getting the point across.
The other day I was getting in my storage locker in the basement when I noticed that the locker next to mine had a note on it. All of our storage lockers come with padlocks that you open with keys. Apprently one of my neighbors had lost their key, so they just scrawled STAY THE FUCK OUT OR ELSE on a piece of paper and taped it to the front of their locker. Classy. See what I mean? The notes must stop.
I'm not trying to be hateful..but I'm kind of fed up with my crazy neighbors. Maybe they really aren't that bad, but we have lived in other apartment buildings and had nothing but pleasant neighbors. Our very first apartment was the cheapest, crappiest place in the world and our neighbors could not have been nicer. They were always sweet and considerate. We never received one note. It seems as we've moved up in the world, our neighbors have gotten more insane. Keep your fingers crossed for us that our neighbors at our new home are angels. We've yet to meet them, and I'm getting a little worried.
The straw that broke the camels back and motivated me to write this post was an event that happened just a few hours ago. Wait til you hear this...This man, a neighbor of mine, came knocking on my door. This doesn't seem so weird, except for the fact that it was almost 11 o' clock at night. When I opened the door, he proceeded to try to sell me his television. Yes, his television. I tried to tell him politely that we already had a television and did not want or need his. But, this pyscho just would not give up. He kept trying to tell me all about the attributes of this (apparently) great TV that he had, even though it didn't even work! Sorry dude, I don't want your television and I especially don't want your shitty, broken television. Also, $50 is not a steal for a shitty, broken television.
After that creepy encounter, I decided to compile a list of things that my I wish my neighbors would stop doing and narrowed it down to the five most irritating. I'm not annoyed with loud music or screaming kids upstairs. I understand that you should expect those kinds of things in an apartment. There are some things, however, that I just can't deal with. We'll start with number 5.
5. Hanging out in the parking lot-Yes, I'm looking at you Camero guy. Camero guy, as my husband and I fondly refer to him, is a guy that just sits on his Camero in the parking lot all day and night. We have sometimes wondered if he even has an apartment here. I've never seen him in the building. Camero guy and his friends, who are all probably in their forties, are taking over our parking lot. I can tolerate underage teeny-boppers hanging out by my car. I cannot tolerate 40 year old men with no lives keeping me awake all night.
4. Smoking in the halls-There is absolutely no reason why you should be smoking in the hallway. Part of the reason we moved into this building is because of the non-smoking policy. I don't care if it's cold. If you need to smoke that badly, step outside. Or at least step inside your own unit, open a window, and try to conceal it. My visitors and I do not want to see/smell you smoking the moment we walk into the building.
3. Doing 50 loads of laundry at a time-We only have 3 (occupied) units on the floor we live on. There are 4 washers and 4 dryers in the laundry room on our floor. You would think that would be enough, right? Wrong. Every single time I go to do laundry, the lady at the end of the hall is taking up all 4 washers and all 4 dryers AT THE SAME TIME. I go back an hour later and she's still hoarding all the machines. One day, I went into the laundry room and seen that all the machines were full. The crazy laundry lady was in there and apologized for the inconvience. I told her I would just go down a floor and do laundry there. I thought it was a good compromise, until she told me that she was also taking up all those machines. Really lady? Who does 16 loads of laundry at once? And she still dresses like a hobo.
2. Leaving your crap in the hallway-This is so irritating to me. One of the things that I love the most about my apartment is the Huge double closet in the entry way. It is literally a walk in closet. We have a strollers, bikes, and all kinds of other large objects in ours. Not only that, but we also all have assigned storage units in the basement of the building. I"m not sure what all my neighbors are using their spaces for though, because all their crap is in the hallway! The couple below me has two bikes, a stroller, and a coffee table sitting outside their door. It's unsightly and if you have that much stuff inside your apartment that it's overflowing into the hallway, you need to call Hoarders. Also, if you are looking to get rid of your crap that won't fit in the hallway, I do not want to buy it.
1. The Notes-Nothing annoys me more than when my neighbors leave all kinds of notes around the building. We've never had a problem with this anywhere else we've lived, but you can walk around and see notes everywhere in this building. I don't know how this strange behavior started, but it needs to stop. If I park my car crooked, someone leaves a rude note about how I made it difficult for them to get into the spot next to me. If I leave my clothes in the dryer too long, someone leaves a note about how disrespectful I am and threatens to throw my garments away(Note:There were 3 other dryers open for use). I could go on and on. If you have something to say to me..here's an idea...why don't you say it!?!? Your illegible chicken-scratch of misspelled words is not reallly getting the point across.
The other day I was getting in my storage locker in the basement when I noticed that the locker next to mine had a note on it. All of our storage lockers come with padlocks that you open with keys. Apprently one of my neighbors had lost their key, so they just scrawled STAY THE FUCK OUT OR ELSE on a piece of paper and taped it to the front of their locker. Classy. See what I mean? The notes must stop.
I'm not trying to be hateful..but I'm kind of fed up with my crazy neighbors. Maybe they really aren't that bad, but we have lived in other apartment buildings and had nothing but pleasant neighbors. Our very first apartment was the cheapest, crappiest place in the world and our neighbors could not have been nicer. They were always sweet and considerate. We never received one note. It seems as we've moved up in the world, our neighbors have gotten more insane. Keep your fingers crossed for us that our neighbors at our new home are angels. We've yet to meet them, and I'm getting a little worried.
Boo
Sadly, I have no pictures to show you of Halloween. Hubby thought it was too cold to wear our costumes. When we took our little one trick-or-treating, she was just too scared. We made it to one house, and she had a mini panic attack when the guy on the porch was wearing a scary mask. I guess her little heart couldn't take it. She cried so hard that she fell asleep in my arms. So, not only did I not get a picture of her in her adorable outfit, I fear she may be scarred for life and hate Halloween forever. The whole day was kind of a bust. Keep your fingers crossed that next year will go better.
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